Happy

One day I'll be happy.

Right now I'm at a difficult stage in my life. I'm in my third year of high school and all I really do is study and stress about exams and assignments. I don't know who I am and I hate it. I want to exercise to stay fit, but I'm a certified couch potato. I have friends I don't like but can't get rid of because they're just there now and trying to pull away would be rude. I get really angry at everyone all the time and most nights, I cry myself to sleep. I'm so stressed out its crazy. I don't have time to worry about the things that I should be able to worry about. I don't have time to do all the things I should be able to do. I'm in all extension classes, I feel way to dumb for all of them, and I absolutely suck at maths. There's a boy that I like that I don't think even knows I exist. I think that the only thing I'm actually good at is tripping on invisible things and falling down the stairs. I've had about five mental breakdowns in the last week. My parents are driving me crazy. I just feel so frustrated all the time, and all I really want to do is rip my own hair out of my head.

I need to sort my shit out.

I guess that feeling is what being a teenager is all about. And I guess that's what we all forget as we get older, because all of my teachers seem not to care just how hard they are on us even though it's pretty clear that if they push just a tiny bit harder, we might all shatter into a million pieces and never be able to put ourselves back together.